


Winter Solstice

by ellewrites



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Explicit Sexual Content, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-22
Updated: 2014-12-22
Packaged: 2018-03-02 19:06:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,353
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2822858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ellewrites/pseuds/ellewrites
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Winter Solstice. The one time of year Levi and Eren were guaranteed to be in the same city. Although it was completely unnecessary because he knew Eren would be here, Levi still pulled the golden pendant from his pocket, flipping it open in his palm and staring at the two little dots, finally aligned on the miniature projection of this slice of earth, hovering over the city of Stohess.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Winter Solstice

**Author's Note:**

  * For [odoridango](https://archiveofourown.org/users/odoridango/gifts).



> This is an idea I wish I had had the time to flesh out more fully because I think it would’ve really shined as a reorganized three or four part piece. It has also been a really long time since I’ve written this genre which is quite near and dear to my heart and wow did I feel it. ;-) This piece was for the Ereri Secret Santa and was written for odoridango and can I just say while researching them I am absolutely blown away by the variety of fic they’ve written? I will definitely be finding time to read their work after the holidays. =) I hope you enjoy! ^^!!

The Winter Solstice. The one time of year Levi and Eren were guaranteed to be in the same city. Although it was completely unnecessary because he knew Eren would be here, Levi still pulled the golden pendant from his pocket, flipping it open in his palm and staring at the two little dots, finally aligned on the miniature projection of this slice of earth, hovering over the city of Stohess.

Levi snapped the lid shut and shoved the scrying glass back into his pocket, trying to ignore the funny feeling it gave him just to see them together. Drawing his coat closer against the cold he opened the door of the inn into the white warped world. It was strange being docked at port for so long after two moons at sea, sleeping without the lull of the waves rocking him down. In fact, he didn’t sleep much at all and he knew he probably looked worse than usual but he hoped it didn’t matter. Surely Eren wouldn’t care – or so he told himself.

Farlan had given him a line about how he should at least try to be a better suitor though as he warned him that he wouldn’t return tonight. Isabel defended him though, replying that a lady liked a rugged look, a little knowing grin on her face but then Isabel had caught Eren aboard the ship in Levi’s chambers once when they were docked and Farlan was out drinking himself blind. So she knew it was no lady Levi was wooing.

He sighed, his breath creating a fog before him as he trudged through the slushy ice and snow. It wasn’t the cold that bothered him – cold at sea was more common than not. No, it was the feeling of shifting earth. Earth was supposed to be stable and steady. He didn’t like the feeling of his feet sliding beneath him without the sway of the waves to influence his momentum.

There were people everywhere. The markets were stuffed with goods from merchants returning to port for this one celebration – the king made sure of it by paying a stipend to every boat that docked within the five days preceding. Honestly, it was a wise decision, allowing his constituents to restock their pantries with fresh food from the north to last the winter. But this king so far had proven himself to be a wise and fair king.

The streets were filled with the smell of pine and cinnamon – a scent Levi immediately associated with the season now – as pine boughs and strips of cinnamon stick were nailed to doorways as was tradition on Stohess. It cut through the underlying stench of the city, of so many people packed together with varying degrees of access to water, but Levi still smelled the stench underneath it all. It was nothing like the sea. Some people couldn’t take the smell of salt but Levi preferred it, even when it was bitter and dank.

Everyone was headed to be as close to the castle as possible and Levi knew he should be headed there too, knew he should make an attempt to see Eren’s display this year. Eren had written him one solitary letter in the past year, when he was passing through a city Levi was only days away from, and in it he described his plans as the most fantastic thing that would ever appear on earth. So he was clearly excited about it. But as the sun set quickly behind the castle Levi found his very limited enthusiasm waning. He was a solitary man – he didn’t have patience for the crowds and the noise and the rampant trickery that went on at such festivals. Normally Levi wouldn’t have even left the port but for the chance to see Eren.

He paused in the street and stared for a minute at the castle. It was illuminated in the golden glow of the sun, a straight shot from the road he was standing in, lifted above the mass of buildings by a gentle sloping hill, and he acknowledged that it was beautiful, in it’s own way. Levi had no interest in castles or cities but for a moment he thought he understood the appeal for Eren. There was something breathtaking about being a part of such madness... something not very unlike the sea.

But instead of following the revealing crowds up the main thoroughfare towards the castle, he cut across the street and headed towards the small stipend apartment of Eren’s, hoping his roommate wasn’t in. Not that he had any particular issue with Armin – after all, he was the mage who created the scrying glass for them – he just preferred to be alone. And Armin, stuck in the city most of the time as an official of the court, would want detailed stories of everywhere he had been since they’d last met. It was understandable but exhausting.

The side streets were far less populated and he passed quickly through, staring up at the combined wood and stone structure with a kind of fondness that was unfamiliar to him. This was perhaps the only stationary place in the world that he considered home.

It seemed that the entire building had been abandoned while the inhabitants attended the festivities as he slipped into the stairwell and climbed up to the little loft apartment. Entering the familiar space was immensely comforting, so much like his captain’s quarters – compact, neat, and meticulously ordered.

Eren was rarely here – more so than Levi but it was obviously Armin who spent the most time there – yet it still felt like Eren to Levi. He took a deep breath to settle himself as he dug two little books out of his pocket and set them on the table for Armin.

He entered Eren’s tiny room and sat down on the bed, staring out the window for a moment at the rooftops of the buildings surrounding them and the clear view of the castle, now difficult to make out but for the way it blocked out all light. Nothing seemed to have changed – the room was nearly exactly as he’d left it last Winter. As always, he found himself hoping Eren would be the same, too.

From inside his coat pocket he withdrew a tiny lacquered box and a pipe and placed it on the table next to the bed. Then, with weary fingers he undid his boots and set them to the side, adding his coat to the pile of Eren’s clothes on the only little wardrobe in the room. It made him soft for a moment, the way Eren had no interest in material things either. Levi’s fingers brushed down the plain case before he pulled out the drawer along the bottom and gathered up the battered paper box resting nestled up against a pile of socks.

Carefully he unwrapped the twine around it as he sat back on the bed, a pile of familiar papers staring back at him as he opened it along with an amulet from the Academy and a very old pocket knife. Levi picked them up and set them on the bed, caressing them just slightly with his fingertips as he remembered how young and eager Eren was when they’d met, just a stow-away on Erwin’s ship, desperate to get out of his small fishing town.

Levi had found him hiding in rags in the storeroom, fire in his eyes alongside fear and that boy immediately made an indelible impression on him. He’d felt that heat in his own bones and he allowed him to stay hidden there until they were too far to turn back to port before ratting him out to Erwin. Erwin had decided to let him stay and so he remained on the ship until they docked near the Academy at Trost and they let him go.

But for those few weeks he was attached to Levi’s hip, so thankful for his confidence. He was a quick study and learned to perform the necessary functions of a deckhand and was quickly more helpful than frustrating, much to Levi’s surprise. That kind of interest and skill was something Levi admired in such a young kid. He found himself hating to see him go.

He thought when Eren left that was the last he would see of him, but Levi was wrong. Every time they docked in Trost, Erwin would leave him a letter and he would send Levi to deliver it. Although he grudgingly accepted the task, as the years passed Levi began to look forward to meeting with the determined if not exceptionally talented stowaway. So much so that when he got his own ship, he continued to the tradition. And when Eren confessed he was going to leave the Academy because he realized he would never be good enough to be a mage of note, Levi invited him to join him at sea once more.

Levi couldn’t help the smile that ghosted across his face as he remembered Eren’s grin. They had engaged in some subtle flirting up to that point but after Levi had offered him a place on his ship no questions asked, Eren leaned forward then and kissed him full on the mouth, totally unexpected, and all Levi could do was stare. It was precious and presumptuous and... and exactly what Levi had wanted to do the whole visit but never would have.

“I’m not you’re stowaway any more,” Eren said when he pulled away – no longer a nine year old boy but now the beginnings of a man. “I’ll make my own way.”

And he did. He became a very well known court magician instead, traveling with the King to woo other royalty. But he’d kept the little knife Levi had given him, a reminder of that ambitious boy that Levi could never forget.

He rifled through the letters, keeping them in careful order, much more numerous than the ones he’d received but then it was easier when Eren had almost always had a stationary address. Levi felt his cheeks get hot as he recognized some of the more gushing ones he’d written towards the beginning of their romance. Although their initial kiss was nice it wasn’t until he’d left for the sea again that Levi realized how badly he’d wanted him and he spent that year penning embarrassing letters of things he’d never be able to say and then tossing them into the sea. As Eren had left the Academy, he didn’t know where to send the letters even if he’d wanted to. Levi felt immeasurably lost without that constant in his life.

But eventually he received a letter from Eren left months ago at his usual port at the Academy that said he was living in Stohess in the castle as a cook of all things, and immediately Levi poured his heart out on paper and, before he had time to regret it, sent it to him. And a month later when he found himself in Stohess he sought Eren out. He remembered his tentative stare, the wordless way Eren opened his mouth and shut it again, unsure exactly what to say. For a moment Levi could have sworn his heart fell into his stomach because he didn’t know exactly what was going to happen. But then Eren was in his arms and his lips were on his and it didn’t matter. Everything was perfect.

Eren wouldn’t leave the castle despite Levi’s attempts at getting him to follow him to sea and so they began this flighty romance. He was sure Eren had other lovers over the years while Levi was so far away the scrying glass couldn’t even pin his location down – and he didn’t blame him. But always when he returned he was welcomed into his arms as if he were the only man in the world that was ever there.

Very methodically Levi reordered the box and lay it back in it’s drawer as though it hadn’t been disturbed. Sometimes he wondered how long they could do this – he was not a young man and his years as a merchant were becoming limited – but the idea of being with Eren all the time was just as scary as losing him completely. Surely Eren had denied following him because he didn’t want to live with him like that. So if he were forced to...

Suddenly the sky light up in a brilliant burst of colors and Levi’s breath caught, compelled to stand and walk over to the window, staring out at the castle. It was as though it was raining light in the sky, blue and red and gold shimmering down to the earth and it was unbelievably lovely and unbelievably loud. Eren’s show, he realized, a bit of him feeling an immeasurable amount of pride that Eren had created something so phenomenal that it literally took his breath away. There wasn’t much that could do that to a man who had crisscrossed the world dozens of times. But then – Eren was special. Eren was that phenomenal.

He stood and watched until it was clear the light display was over and then he lay back in bed again and waited for Eren to return. He would be so thrilled with himself when he returned – and rightfully so. But Levi especially loved those times when Eren was so happy. It made seeing him like a dream from which he never wanted to wake up.

Immediately he snapped awake when Eren returned, unaware he had even fallen asleep but then the Solstice festivities went until the dawn. Levi looked to the doorway to see Eren there, his smile lit by the light he’d manifested in his palm.

“I left as soon as I could,” he spoke quietly but just hearing his voice settled the weary discomfort in Levi’s soul.

“I saw it,” Levi said, his own voice groggy from sleep as Eren sat down on the bed next to him, lighting the torch on the bedside table and leaning over to remove his shoes.

“Oh?”

“From the window,” Levi explained as he cleared his throat, his fingers hesitant as they touched Eren’s shoulder blade through his shirt, as though he were a dream that would disappear upon contact – but he didn’t. “It was awesome.”

Eren twisted his body to look down at Levi and he smiled again, his face distorted by shadow and light, and though Levi struggled to remember it over the long months at sea as soon as he saw it again he knew every curve and no trick of the light made a difference to him.

“Ah! My fireworks?” His grin was open and honest and he chuckled a little. “I may not have the talent of a true mage but I found a way to be just as spectacular.”

And then, in one swift motion born of a lifetime aboard a ship, Levi sat up, gathered his shirt in his fists and pulled him halfway down into a kiss. Eren _was_ spectacular. Eren had never believed it about himself – he was discouraged from the Academy by his family then discouraged from becoming a mage by the Academy but he had never given up or given in. He started at the castle as a cook as he bided his time, developing a form of magic never performed anywhere and then performing it for kings across the world. But to himself in the quiet recesses of his heart, he was just that boy who’d only ever held a knife to gut fish and that was all he would ever be. But not to Levi.

Eren laughed, warm and full as he turned to lay on the bed next to Levi, stroking a hand back through his hair and down to the buttons of his shirt. That laugh had the power to undo him completely, so rich and tenor and confident now as an adult, worlds away from the shaky embarrassment of his childhood self when Levi rebuked his mistakes. And with that same mouth that laughed that laugh he kissed him again, fingers working deftly down the buttons, and as always Levi did not feel the older man with Eren.

“You are eager,” Eren teased and Levi turned irritated eyes to him, refusing to show his embarrassment, unable to understand how Eren could turn him into a blithering idiot so quickly.

“You made me wait,” he shot back as Eren’s mouth moved down his neck.

He lay there, stubborn and inflexible as Eren slid the shirt off his shoulders, pulling it from the waistband of his pants. Eren’s mouth teased at his abs, his teeth nipping at the top of his hips as he deliberately skirted around his pants but Levi was never about teasing after going so long without him. The fingers of his left hand twisted themselves in Eren’s hair as his right unlaced his pants, freeing himself and he felt the warmth of Eren’s breath along his shaft as he laughed once again.

But that only lasted a minute as Levi pushed Eren’s mouth down on his cock, groaning at the wet heat surrounding him. It was stupid but he’d spent his months away very deliberately denying all physical contact with anyone that when in Eren’s presence he could hardly help himself. Eren was the only one he trusted, the only one who knew him well enough. And he needed him, needed to get it out of his system so he could think rationally again.

Eren didn’t mind it rough and he didn’t mind having his hair held either but then Levi was careful not to take it too far as his skin shivered with delight at Eren’s expert attention. And Eren’s hand worked up his body to a nipple, working it with his fingers as his other hand jerked down his pants. And he palmed and kneaded his ass, slipping his fingers down the crack, feeling him out and drawing out a hard-fought for moan from Levi’s lips as one finger worked it’s way inside him.

Levi could feel his abs tighten as the pressure built in his gut and he gasped as he drug Eren away before he came. He looked up into his eyes, noting the gentle acceptance and happiness that he found there, and he said the same thing he always said at this first vulnerable junction after so long apart

“I’m sorry.”

And just like always, Eren ignored it completely. He didn’t accept the apology, he didn’t even acknowledge it. It was the only time in his life Levi had ever uttered those words but then Eren was the only one who had ever deserved them. He should’ve taken him back to his village, he should’ve never let him off the boat. He should’ve made him come with him when he left the Academy, he should’ve offered him a real job. He should’ve rejected his kiss, he should’ve never written him that letter explaining his true feelings. What did Levi ever have to offer him? He didn’t have stability, he didn’t want it either. Instead he was a poor influence for over half Eren’s life and still he came back, over and over, he just couldn’t help himself. He was Levi’s only constant and though he should’ve stopped this whole thing before it even began, he found he never really could. Because he loved him, as wrong as that was, and instead of being able to say that he said the only two words he could.

But Eren never seemed to see it that way and instead he opened a pot on the table next to the bed and slicked his fingers in oil. And Levi slammed his eyes shut as he felt them stretching him, his own hands working efficiently at Eren’s clothes, no sight necessary after years of tying and untying knots in the damp, icy cold.

Now, though, his fingers traversed hot flesh and he dragged them across Eren’s skin, not as muscular now as his own, a healthy diet creating a pleasant softness across his frame. Still when Eren took him he took him hard, pushing him down into the bed, muscles straining and obvious in the flickering light. And Eren kissed him hard too, muffled his groans with his mouth, and finally Levi felt he could truly let go.

When he was unable to withstand the friction any longer he came and he came hard against Eren’s abs, eliciting a gasp and a flighty chuckle from Eren who slowed, fingers digging into his ass as he pulled him close. A few last thrusts and he was moaning soft affections, words Levi could never say, with his eyes shut tight and his lips ghosting against Levi’s ear.

Levi envied how much easier it was for him and he wondered, as he often did, what Eren received in return. Aside of the one embarrassing letter he’d sent, he’d never really shown Eren any particular amount of affection. But then, Eren lay his head on his chest, wrapping his arms around him and tucking his head up under his chin as he breathed a sigh of contentment. Whether Levi said anything or not, it seemed, just his presence was enough.

With calloused fingers he stroked back the sweaty hair from Eren’s forehead, that gentle touch more affection than he had shown any other living thing and Eren seemed to know that as he smiled beneath it. And then he reached for Levi’s pipe and tobacco box, packing the little pipe and lighting it with his fingers.

“This is good stuff,” Eren said as he took a draw before handing it to Levi and then suddenly lifting himself off the bed with an excited “oh!” He reached down for his coat and drew out a little bag, putting his hand in and pulling out a handful of what Levi could only describe as dust.

“You distracted me,” he admonished with a grin. “I wanted to be romantic.” Then he threw the dust up in the air, out towards the foot of the bed, twisting his fingers into a fist and then expanding them outward.

Suddenly it was like hundreds of fireflies were alight in the room and Levi stared as the fine particles seemed to glow white, hanging in the air. They were sinking slowly but very slowly and Levi felt that bit of amazement he always felt as a mute. Eren may not have been particularly gifted in magic, but it was something so wonderful and foreign to Levi that he was always impressed.

“Armin helped me develop it,” he explained as he settled back in against Levi’s chest, resting a hand on his stomach as he stared out at his creation. “His Excellency likes to make a big show of it, it’s pretty ridiculous,” he explained with a chuckle. “Wants everywhere he walks to be followed by a trail of the stuff.”

Levi felt his lips tilt up a little as he rested his head down on Eren’s, feeling his soft hair against his cheek. He was proud of him for winning such favor, knew he had worked hard for it, compensated for his failings with his intelligence and unique ideas and he deserved his place in the king’s entourage and yet...

“I wish you would come with me.” The words escaped his lips as a matter of habit, the same thing he always said in this first quiet post-coital moment. The ones which followed were never so emotionally intense as the first when he had a buffer again, when he began rebuilding the walls around his heart that allowed him to leave Eren over and over again.

Eren lifted himself up to kiss his mouth, full and sweet and sincere. And he said the same thing he always said in response – “I can no more leave the earth than you can leave the sea.”

Levi placed his hand on Eren’s cheek and ran his thumb across it, staring into his eyes, as deep and endless as the ocean he called home and he thought – maybe that was it. The reason he found a home in Eren, the only human he ever did – because there was an ocean inside of him, drawing him in like the tides, fierce and unpredictable and passionate and utterly unable to be conquered.

And suddenly there was a banging on the door that caused them both to jump and Armin’s voice called through – “you’d best put your pants on because I’m coming in!”

Eren laughed apologetically, Levi’s face immediately falling back into it’s typical glare as Eren grabbed the blanket and pulled it over them. He had explained in the past the lack of boundaries they had being roommates at the Academy and Levi understood having lived a majority of his life in the tight quarters of a ship but he’d just wanted more time with his guard down, tonight. But then, he always wanted more time.

The door swung open and Armin was holding the books Levi had left on the table, brandishing them about in front of himself, excitement written all over his face as he charged through the dying embers floating slowly to the floor without a second thought and flopped himself at the foot of the bed.

“Are these authentic?” he demanded and Levi scoffed. “Well, where did you get them? Because I need to be able to prove their authenticity. And I told you not to light this stuff in small quarters, Eren – it’s a hazard.”

Although being forced to answer a thousand questions about where he got his goods was not typically Levi’s idea of a good time, he liked Armin. And listening to Armin and Eren laugh back and forth as they discussed the Solstice display and how they can make it bigger and better next year combined the expensive tobacco and the soft sheets and Eren’s warm body pressed up against him, well... Despite himself Levi decided that this was good too and that maybe, one day, he might allow himself to have it forever.


End file.
